


Those

by Shay_Nioum



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Logan firmly tells him what's what, Logan yells at Patton, M/M, Patton doesn't take Logan being aro all that well, Patton has a crush on Logan that just doesn't work out, Unrequited Love, aromantic logan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-05
Updated: 2019-06-05
Packaged: 2020-04-08 12:04:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19106740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shay_Nioum/pseuds/Shay_Nioum
Summary: Some things are better left unsaid, but in this case, things need to be said in whatever way they can be said. Regardless of whose hearts, they might break in the process.





	Those

“I don’t have those feelings!” Logan found himself screaming back at Patton, he didn’t quite understand how it had gotten to this point. Perhaps Patton had just been poking him a little bit too much on the subject, asking him what he “felt” in a certain situation, or just… acted as if he was just like the others. Logan wasn’t certain as to which one it was, because he wasn’t like the others, he didn’t like to be prodded on the subject of his emotions, and he most certainly didn’t feel things. At least not in the manner that Patton was asking about, that much he was certain of.

He felt a flush of humiliation turning his cheeks crimson as the warm tears pooled in his eyes and cascaded down his cheeks like a waterfall of shame. Each breath hitched on the next, like a low hanging chain from a truck catching on every rock it ran over.

He hated it, he hated it with as much emotional depth as he was capable of giving himself to this kind of topic.  

Patton’s eyes were hard and steely. The usual cold look of frozen metal that he gave his children before he was about to guilt-trip them or give them some kind of longwinded lecture that would make them fall into place like little ducklings behind their mother. But not this time, Logan didn’t want to fall into place this time. These were his emotions, not Patton’s, his. He knew just what he did, and what he didn’t have.

He knew.

“Logan,” Patton’s voice was stern but kind, the sort of stern that was usually shortly followed by a well-placed timeout or a punishment that involved having no dessert or dinner before bed. “You have emotions, I know that you have emotions because I-”

No, he was going to stop him right there as his tears of sadness became tears of burning seething rage that left his entire body quaking like that of an erupting volcano seconds before an eruption.

Tears that felt more like pooling magma dripping down his face, and freezing icicles that left a trail on his face. Tears that were shortly followed by a snarl, as his lips pulled down and his teeth became bared like that of a vicious animal ready to rip the throat out of the predator that was threatening him. In this case, the predator being Patton himself, as his arms crossed with an angered expression written all over his face.

“No,” Logan cut him off quickly and defiantly, he wasn’t going to listen to this anymore. He had to if he was going to say just what he needed to say to his friend, that is, without being interrupted by someone who apparently knew him so much more than he knew himself. “You don’t know Patton. I know that I have emotions that much is glaringly obvious, but I cannot love! I will not love! You cannot make me!” Logan’s voice steadily grew more and more thunderous as the seconds passed by and with each word that was ripped right out of his lips, and with each second that passed by he felt even more and more brittle. As if the second he was interrupted he would shatter beyond repair, so the words kept spilling out before he could even think of stopping them. “And even if I were capable of such a feeling as love, I most certainly wouldn’t love YOU!” He screamed, the feelings that had steadily been building and building throughout the weeks..no the months came spilling out like the tears that drenched his face. 

His fists were shaking as he stared back at the other’s heartbroken and utterly crushed expression. It was an expression of someone who’d had everything he’d ever known just flipped on its head, who’d just been gutted in the most brutal but efficient way possible, it was the look of someone who didn’t know what to do next.

But he wasn’t sorry, he’d be damned if he was going to be sorry about something like this.

Straightening his back, Logan stood as stiff and as straight as a board. “I am who I am Patton,” Logan’s voice was icy as he spoke, the passion and heat that had been filling his voice all but gone as he stared back at the other man. “You can either accept that..and accept me in turn… or..or...” He swallowed thickly, another wave of tears threatening to choke him and forget his words as a result. Patton had been his friend for years upon years, they’d broken bones together and patched up their scrapes and bruises together while shedding tears together. They’d shared an ice cream on hot summer days, and they’d helped clean it off when it had dripped all over them. Logan had helped Patton with his failing grades, just as Patton had helped Logan to make many more friends through their years of school. Patton knew that he felt, that he felt things so intensely that he didn’t have words for them sometimes. He knew that all throughout his life that Logan had felt everything, from hurt to happiness, he’d felt it all.

Everything except the one thing that Patton himself had found, in Logan no less.

So saying this wasn’t going to be easy by any stretch of the word.

It wasn’t going to be easy for either of them.

But it needed to be said regardless of how it would hurt them both.

“Or…” The words clogged his throat, but he forced them out either way. “Or you can leave, and never ever call yourself my friend again. Because I know what I am Patton.” Logan’s fierce stare glowered right back at the other man’s tearstained face, he refused to falter and he refused to back down and just go on as they once were.

“I am aromantic, and I refuse to change that for you or for anyone else from now on.”

He wasn’t scared of what Patton’s expression would morph into, just as he wasn’t scared what his friend would choose to see him as from now on.

He refused to be scared about this.

He. Refused.


End file.
